GIFT IDEAS THAT WORK WELL

Giving to employees:

• Amaryllis plant
• Desk accessories, like a beautiful pen or small clock that is nice and upscale, a beautiful letter opener, or a beautiful desk blotter
• Gift basket. Get food that people really eat, not those ultra-gourmet things
• Electronic gifts. Like the newest of what's out in the market. A lot of it is not that expensive
• A week off with pay. It's one of the most appreciated gifts

Giving to peers:

• An evening out. I think the most fun thing to do is to figure out something that the two of you really like to do together and then buy the tickets around it or pay the admission"
• A picture frame
• Candles and candleholders
• Childcare. "If it's somebody with children, a pass for one afternoon of babysitting or an evening out"
• Pet sitting. "If someone's got a dog, and they hate to board the dog, give them a coupon." Bixler recommends. "This is worth three free days of dog-sitting the next time you are out of town
• Subscription to "a magazine they would think interesting"
• An autographed book

"Gift-giving can actually be a disaster," Bixler asserts, "and there are lots of ways it can be a disaster."

Among common errors, she says:

Giving wine or liquor to someone who doesn't drink.

Giving an elaborate gift that can seem like a bribe.

Giving a gift with religious significance to a person who doesn't practice that religion.

"Gift-giving needs to be something that is well-considered and thought out," cautions Bixler. The first order of business in gift-giving, says Bixler, is to establish a sound principle for giving.

"It's a way to show appreciation. It's a way to encourage, and it's certainly a way to thank people for all the hard work that they've done," she says.

"If you're a boss giving to your employees, make sure that the gifts are equal [among] their peer group," Bixler advises.

Bixler says making gifts similar even across hierarchal lines is a good idea. She discourages giving markedly different gifts for management and staff.

"I think it creates a tiered approach," she says. "It creates a better team if people are gifted the same."

"It's always better to go a little bit more modest with the boss as opposed to overdoing it, because it can make people really uncomfortable," she says. "If, for instance, someone gives the boss an expensive gift from Tiffany's, and everyone else gives golf balls."

Focus on the recipient by giving the gift that is the best tribute to the boss, not the one you think makes you look most competitive among other gift-givers, Bixler advises.

"I think the overriding principle is the thoughtfulness, to really select something that focuses on that person and think about what they would really appreciate." she says.

For a boss or co-worker who has everything, "What may honor them is a donation in their name to their favorite charity," Bixler says.

Competitiveness and grandstanding aren't what gift-giving is about, Bixler says. "The gift is not supposed to be about us; it's supposed to be about them."

Whatever you give, to the boss or co-worker, "The gift should be very nicely wrapped and well-presented," Bixler says. "It needs to have a card with it so you express the right sentiment."

And, when you find yourself on the receiving end this holiday season, don't forget a written thank-you note. A written thank-you note is absolutely mandatory.